From just 12 feet away, Scotty’s attacker fired 10 shots at him in Afghanistan, striking the Army infantryman’s shoulder, hip, and thigh. Scotty survived but saw the shooter’s face each night as he tried to sleep. Seeking help, he found that treatments like exposure therapy can help Veterans like him manage PTSD caused by the severest of traumas.
View Video TranscriptI was deployed to Afghanistan in the Kandahar province and we were on mission and I was shot ten times, five times in the shoulder, four in the hip and then once in the thigh. And from that moment on, I mean, it was really when the mental health issues and journey kind of began.
Hey, my name's Scotty and I was in the United States Army, 11 Bravo, and I served from 2010 to 2015. Going to war in general, you know, you see a lot of things that most humans don't have to see, and it kind of sticks with you, but then you throw in, you know, the trauma of getting shot ten times, and he shot me from probably about 12 feet away, so I saw his face. I know exactly what he looks like. From then on out, every night before I would fall asleep, I would see his face every night. PTSD, depression, anxiety, like that's all very, very real. And it became very real, very quickly for me.
I was realizing that I wasn't the same person. I had to get out of this fight or flight mode if I was going to continue to be the best dad that I could be, the best son that I could be, you know, the best brother that I could be. And I knew immediately that I needed to get help or it was going to consume me. For the longest time I fought it, you know, it was like, ‘Oh, I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine.’ And just came to a realization that it was just eating me alive.
I've tried just about everything. Individual therapy is great to a point. Group therapy is great to a point. For me, the one that really, truly helped was exposure therapy. Exposing myself to crowds and exposing myself to situations where I would really start freaking out.
For me, I wanted to be a lifer. Like I wanted to do 20 years. I wanted to make the military my career. So the transition for me was hard because it's just a compound of things that just get thrown onto you about, ‘I need to find a job. I need to still take care of my family, but also I have this injury. How am I gonna do that?’ I went through the times where it was kind of like feel sorry for myself and I can't do this. I don't know how I'm gonna do this. Maybe I should just, you know, give up and just give in and just not do it.’ And really that was when I decided that I was gonna live my life for my best friends who would never have the opportunity because that's what they would want. And that kind of changed everything for me.
I'm the type of guy that wants to understand things. For me, the best therapy was, you know, talking to a therapist and understanding why my body reacts this way, why my mind reacts this way. Why is this happening? Why is this happening? It was a lot of working on myself. And still to this day, with PTSD and depression and anxiety, it's, it's hard to, to live in a moment. It's hard to be here right now.
I went through a lot of times where I would start having panic attacks in crowds, start breathing heavier, your, you know, your palms start getting sweaty, you immediately start going into fight or flight. It's hard to get out of, but it's possible. The thing that really helped me a lot was imagery, you know, closing your eyes, imagining where you are, where you wanna be. Really, man, that has helped me more than anything. And, you know, just breathing and, you know, if you have someone there with you kind of using them as a support as well. For me, I know, if I start feeling a certain way, a lot of times, like, if I like, reach out and touch my girlfriend or I reach out and touch my kids, like, it gives me that, that little bit of grounding.
So I shot archery with US Paralympic program. Archery was kind of an escape for me, you know? For seven seconds right before that arrow releases, nothing else in the world matters, except for you being in that moment and firing that shot at the target. And then COVID shut it down, and I needed to find something, because, you know, when it gets quiet is when the demons knock the loudest, and COVID was very, very quiet. I had a guitar in the corner of my room, and one day I was like, "Man, I'm gonna learn how to play this thing." And then from there, you know, I had this new escape and I had this new sense of purpose and playing the guitar, but I still had feelings and emotions that I didn't know what to do with.
I've been blessed and lucky enough to find music as a tool for therapy. When I'm writing a song, when I'm on stage playing, anytime I have a guitar in my hand, it, it is therapy happening. The most important thing that you can do as a Vet is to just go out and try everything, and who knows? Who knows what could come from it? A lot of times, us Veterans, you know, we're told we can't do something and we're like, "All right, let me show you.” It's important to get that mindset back. It's important to, to feel that again, you know? Your, your quality of life can improve. You just have to do the work to do it.
No matter what you may be experiencing, there is support for getting your life on a better track. Many, many Veterans have found the strength to reach out and make the connection.
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If you find yourself living with guilt or remorse about a past action or inaction, try to set aside time to think about your feelings. Remember that everyone has things they would have done differently—but no one can change the past or predict the future. Sometimes the experience is worse if you keep your feelings to yourself. Telling someone, like a family member or friend, about your regrets or guilty feelings can be a good first step to overcoming them. Learn more steps you can take on our Guilt page.
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If you are experiencing headaches, try to rest with your eyes closed and head supported. Getting enough sleep, eating regularly without skipping meals, staying hydrated, and maintaining good posture are simple lifestyle changes that can help you avoid or reduce headaches. Talk to your doctor if you experience frequent or recurring headaches, which can be a sign of a medical issue. Learn more steps you can take on our Headaches page.
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There are several ways to improve your sleep right away: (1) Make your bedroom a place just for sleeping—not for activities like watching TV, reading, working, or listening to the radio. (2) Avoid light exposure from screens at night, which can throw off your sleep cycle. (3) Avoid alcohol and large meals near bedtime. (4) Maintain a regular sleep schedule. In addition, talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Trouble Sleeping page.
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If you are experiencing confusion, try to slow down and focus on the task at hand. Take regular breaks to avoid feeling tired and overwhelmed. Avoid drinking alcohol, which can make confusion worse. Talk to your health care provider to determine whether a medical condition such as TBI might be contributing to the problem. You can also talk to a pharmacist about the possible effects of medications you're taking. Learn more steps you can take on our Confusion page.
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If you are experiencing difficulty concentrating, avoid distractions like loud music or the television. Develop a routine and try to stick to a regular schedule. Additionally, take regular breaks to prevent feeling tired. Talk to your health care provider to determine whether a condition such as TBI, ADHD, or anxiety might be contributing to the problem. You can also talk to a pharmacist about the possible effects of medications you're taking. Learn more steps you can take on our Difficulty Concentrating page.
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If you are experiencing dizziness, lie down for a few minutes with your head slightly elevated. Lifestyle changes such as drinking more water, getting enough rest, and avoiding alcohol or drugs can help. Medications and medical conditions such as heart disease or ear issues can also cause dizziness; consult a medical provider if you get dizzy on a regular basis. If you suddenly lose function in part of your body (e.g., arm weakness, face drooping, difficulty speaking) along with experiencing vertigo, this can indicate a serious problem, such as a stroke. Call 911 and seek medical help immediately. Learn more steps you can take on our Dizziness page.
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Flashbacks
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A flashback can be distressing for you and those around you. Try grounding yourself by focusing on details of your surroundings or neutral physical sensations, such as the feeling of your feet on the floor. Call someone you trust and tell them what is happening. Your family, friends, or health care provider may be able to provide support and help you deal with your flashbacks. Learn more steps you can take on our Flashbacks page.
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Noise or Light Irritation
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Video Title: Army Veteran Encourages Others To “Be Vulnerable” in Order To Heal
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If I'm experiencing noise or light irritation, what can I do about it right away?
Learn what triggers episodes of noise or light irritation. Try making adjustments to computer and TV screens, and ensure you get the right amount of sleep. If you're taking medication and want to know if it could be affecting your sensitivity to noise or light, talk to your doctor. Certain drugs or medications may cause vision or hearing problems. Never stop taking a prescription without first consulting a medical professional. Learn more steps you can take on our Noise or Light Irritation page.
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Nightmares
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Video Title: Nightmares | Signs of a Mental Health Challenge
Video Title: The first thing I noticed was nightmares
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If I’m having nightmares, what can I do about it right away?
To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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High-Risk Activities
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Video Title: Anything's Possible
Video Title: “We’re stronger together.” Army Veteran Urges Women Veterans To Get Support
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What can I do about drinking or drug use?
There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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Gambling
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If I’m experiencing a gambling problem, what can I do about it right away?
The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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Video Title: “Each day was a new opportunity.” Veteran Reflects on Sobriety Journey
Video Title: I was carrying a heavy load
Video Title: Veteran strength to reach recovery
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What can I do if I’ve noticed myself engaging in reckless behavior?
There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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