What does it mean if you are having feelings of hopelessness?
Do you sometimes feel like your life is worthless? Is it hard to imagine that things will ever get better? Do you sometimes think, "Why should I even bother?" These thoughts are common examples of hopelessness and can often occur when individuals are feeling depressed or anxious.
Hopelessness can happen when someone is going through difficult times or painful experiences. Or you might feel hopeless without a specific reason. You might feel overwhelmed, trapped, or insecure, or you might have a lot of self-doubt. You might think that challenges are insurmountable or that there are no solutions to the problems you are facing.
At some point in your life, you may have experienced some of these feelings — it's a part of being human. However, when hopelessness lasts for a while, takes up a lot of your time, or troubles you, it might be a signal that you need outside support. Hopelessness might be a sign that you are depressed or that you may be on your way toward depression.
Sometimes hopelessness can lead to thoughts of wishing you could go to sleep and not wake up, or to a plan to harm yourself and end your life.
You may not have shared your feelings of hopelessness or thoughts of harming yourself with others. However, there are some thoughts or actions you and others might notice that are warning signs of a person needing help or possibly being in crisis:
- Appearing sad or feeling depressed most of the time
- Having persistent or worsening trouble sleeping or eating
- Feeling anxious or agitated
- Neglecting personal hygiene and health
- Withdrawing from friends, family, and society
- Sleeping all the time
- Losing interest in hobbies, work, school, or other things you used to care about
- Experiencing frequent and dramatic mood changes
- Having feelings of extreme guilt or shame
- Having feelings of failure or frustration from not doing things as well as you used to
- Feeling as if life is not worth living, or as if you have no sense of purpose
- Feeling trapped, like there is no way out of a situation
- Having feelings of despair or thinking there’s no solution to your problems
In addition, noticeable changes in behavior are warning signs that you may need to seek help. These include:
- Performing poorly at work or school
- Acting recklessly or engaging in risky activities without thinking of consequences
- Engaging in self-destructive voilence or violent behavior such as punching holes in walls or getting into fights; feeling rage or uncontrolled anger; or contemplating revenge
- Acting as though you have a “death wish,” tempting fate by taking risks that could lead to death, such as driving fast or running red lights
- Giving away prized possessions
- Putting your affairs in order, tying up loose ends, and/or making out a will
- Seeking access to firearms, pills, or other means of harming yourself
If feelings of hopelessness are accompanied by any of the following, you should reach out for help immediately:
- You feel like a burden to others.
- You are thinking you'd be better off dead, are making plans to harm yourself, or are thinking about suicide.
- You are not taking care of yourself in the ways that you need to stay alive.
Any of these thoughts or behaviors requires attention. If you have serious thoughts of death or suicide or are thinking about hurting or killing yourself, it's important that you talk to someone right away. To reach the Veterans Crisis Line, Dial 988 then Press 1, use the online chat service, or send a text message to 838255. The Veterans Crisis Line offers free, confidential support, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
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What can cause feelings of hopelessness?
Some Veterans’ distress may be related to very traumatic events like the death of someone from their unit, seeing people die, or sexual assault or abuse. Other Veterans’ difficulties may be the result of a major setback such as a divorce or job loss. Some people may think about hurting themselves due to the buildup of stress, depression, anxiety, or posttraumatic stress that makes life seem as if it’s just not bearable anymore.
No matter what the reason, people who think about dying may see suicide as the only way to escape their pain and feelings of hopelessness. It is important to realize that help is available and that depression, anxiety, and hopelessness can be treated — even if you can't see a solution right now.
“It was so hard to push suicidal thoughts out of my mind that I would wake up and I would think about suicide. I would sleep for my two hours a night and I would dream about suicide. You know, I would go to bed thinking about suicide.”
Most people who think about harming themselves are dealing with difficult experiences or conditions that can be successfully treated. These may include:
- Bipolar disorder
- Alcohol or drug problems
- A history of physical emotional, or sexual abuse, including military sexual trauma (MST)
- Traumatic brain injury (TBI)
- Posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
If you are a Veteran or know a Veteran who is experiencing any of these signs, know that you are not alone and that help is available.
Some people, including some Veterans, hurt themselves and don’t intend to die, but are attempting to “feel” something or “punish” themselves. This, too, is risky behavior, and help is available. Never hesitate to talk to someone about these issues or to contact the Veterans Crisis Line if you need to talk to someone immediately.
If I’m feeling hopeless or having thoughts of hurting myself, what can I do about it right away?
If you are a Veteran or know a Veteran who is having thoughts of suicide, you should talk to someone right away. Your family and friends may already know that you’re having a tough time. You may want to turn to them and let them know what you’re feeling and thinking.
“I wanted to end it all because I thought I had failed myself as a corpsman. I had failed myself as far as I was concerned by not being the best Soldier that I could be. I felt like I also failed my family. My father had been a military man. He always told me: ‘When you serve, you serve 100 percent. Don’t come back any less than that.’”
You can also call the Veterans Crisis Line, Dial 988 then Press 1, use the online chat service, or send a text message to 838255. The Veterans Crisis Line offers free, confidential support, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. The Veterans Crisis Line can also connect you with a suicide prevention coordinator at your local VA.
You can also take a confidential self-check quiz to better understand what you’re going through and if it may be a good idea to seek professional help. Your anonymous answers to a brief list of questions will be reviewed by an experienced counselor who will then send you a personal response to a secure website. The counselor will also provide you with resources and options for further follow-up.
Take the next step to connect with care.
Every day, Veterans from all military service branches and eras connect with proven resources and effective treatments. Here’s how to take the next step: the one that’s right for you.
Read VA's latest coronavirus information. If you have flu-like symptoms such as fever, cough, and shortness of breath, please call before you visit your local medical center or clinic. If you have an appointment, consider making it a telehealth appointment.
New to VA? Apply for health care benefits.
- Getting started is simple. Create a free account online to help ease your enrollment process. To prepare to apply for VA health care in person, by telephone, or by mail, explore VA’s “How to Apply” page.
- Not sure whether you are eligible for VA health care benefits? Read about eligibility for VA health care.
- Unsure of what kind of help you need? Call 1-877-222-VETS (1-877-222-8387) to find the right resources to meet your needs, Monday through Friday, 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. ET. If you have hearing loss, call TTY: 1-800-877-8339.
- Veterans’ family members and caregivers can see whether they qualify for VA medical benefits as a spouse, surviving spouse, dependent child, or caregiver. Explore family and caregiver health benefits.
Already enrolled in VA and interested in mental health support? Schedule a mental health appointment.
- If you’re already enrolled and using VA health care, the fastest way to schedule VA appointments is to call the VA facility where you want to receive care.
- With VA Appointments tools, you can schedule some VA health care appointments online, view details about upcoming appointments, and organize your health care calendar.
- If you’re not using VA medical services, contact your nearest VA medical center or Vet Center to talk about your needs.
What about other options at VA? VA offers a variety of tools and resources.
- The Veteran Training online self-help portal for overcoming everyday challenges includes modules on managing anger, developing parenting and problem-solving skills, and more.
- Mental health apps for Veterans cover a variety of topics, ranging from PTSD to anger management to quitting smoking.
- VA TeleMental Health connects you with a VA mental health provider through a computer or mobile device in your home or at your nearest VA health facility. You can learn more about this option from your local VA medical center.
- Vet Centers are community-based counseling centers across the nation in all 50 states and US territories that provide a wide range of social and psychological services, including professional readjustment counseling to eligible Veterans, Service members – including National Guard and Reserve components – and their families. Counselors and outreach staff, many of whom are Veterans themselves, are experienced and prepared to discuss the tragedies of war, loss, grief and transition after trauma. To learn more, visit the Vet Center website or find a nearest Vet Center. Teams are also available 24/7 by phone at 1-877-927-8387.
What about support beyond VA?
There’s a whole community of support ready to help with whatever you’re going through. Use this tool to find resources near you.