After Thomas returned from Vietnam, he had trouble sleeping, problems with alcohol, and his personal and professional relationships were impacted. He didn't recognize he had symptoms of depression, but when other Veterans reached out and inspired him, Thomas went to VA. He was able to get the support he needed to turn his life around.
View Video TranscriptThomas:
My name is Thomas. I served in the United States Air Force 1970-1973, as part of the Vietnam Era Veteran. I served briefly in Thailand. People in the Military were very much looked down on and the Vietnam War was looked down on, especially in the North and it became very difficult. I tried to live up in Massachusetts for a while and it became impossible.
My experiences in the military had, unbeknownst to me at the time, caused some severe problems. I had been seen by a psychiatrist while I was in the military after I had my injury and it was a continuing, ongoing thing that I was treated in the military for depression. This problem of depression and the anxiety that went with it, and the other issues that evolved from military life and transitioning into civilian life, showed up in very strange ways. You don’t know about it and you are not looking for them unless you know what to look for, so you just kind of shrug it off.
I went from having normal sleep when I was in college and before military life, I would sleep a good 8-10 hours at night and have a normal restful sleep without waking up. After military life, I would get about 4-6 hours sleep, and I thought that this was normal. I thought that it was just kind of what happens. It wasn’t until almost 12 years ago that I started seeing a psychiatrist and he said no this is normal if you have got depression.
I was married for 5 years to a very lovely woman. We had issues going back and forth, we cared about each other very much, but the fact of the matter is part of the anxiety was always there. Its going to have negative consequences and it did. Eventually she wasn’t happy with her lifestyle because of trying to deal with me all the time and I was not a happy camper.
My second wife, we had 3 children and it more-or-less went the same way. Unless you get professional help with it, and begin to realize and see what’s wrong, you are going to continue on this pathway and scratch your head. There was a period also after school when I was working for businesses, I was a corporate lawyer, alcohol plays a big role in corporate politics and for somebody that has either depression or a psychological problem, alcohol is the one thing they should stay away from. But it is usually the one thing they get drawn to, because it subconsciously eases the pain that you feel inside, and you don’t know why you are feeling it. You don’t even know that you are feeling it sometimes.
The depression was manifesting itself in a lot of different ways and it was affecting my ability to work, and it was affecting my relationships within the company. I finally went to the VA in 2003 and it was because I had been working with Veterans and saw the other Veterans that were having problems, were getting help, and it was working. VA was working you know. It was a real success story on some of these Veterans who would get into the system and get their health benefits and move on with their lives.
I have seen an improvement to the work, others have seen it. My ex wife sees me now and she sees me as a completely different person. My children, especially my son, there was a time in his life when he wanted nothing to do with me and now he is my best friend. I would say since 2008 when I started seeing the psychiatrist that I am seeing Thomas: now, life has been a lot better. So, it is another success story for VA, it really is. It is important that people do understand that you can be an average everyday citizen and after combat, have a problem that needs outreach, that needs correction, that needs therapy and you can continue on with your life. You can improve your life. Life will get better.
No matter what you may be experiencing, there is support for getting your life on a better track. Many, many Veterans have found the strength to reach out and make the connection.
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A flashback can be distressing for you and those around you. Try grounding yourself by focusing on details of your surroundings or neutral physical sensations, such as the feeling of your feet on the floor. Call someone you trust and tell them what is happening. Your family, friends, or health care provider may be able to provide support and help you deal with your flashbacks. Learn more steps you can take on our Flashbacks page.
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Learn what triggers episodes of noise or light irritation. Try making adjustments to computer and TV screens, and ensure you get the right amount of sleep. If you're taking medication and want to know if it could be affecting your sensitivity to noise or light, talk to your doctor. Certain drugs or medications may cause vision or hearing problems. Never stop taking a prescription without first consulting a medical professional. Learn more steps you can take on our Noise or Light Irritation page.
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Nightmares
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To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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What can I do about drinking or drug use?
There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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Gambling
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If I’m experiencing a gambling problem, what can I do about it right away?
The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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What can I do if I’ve noticed myself engaging in reckless behavior?
There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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