Barry got out of the Army and couldn't find work. He was anxious, began drinking, and lost his friends and home. With help from VA, he stopped drinking and finished college, though he later lost his way and spent time in prison. After his release, Barry found a mentor at VA who helped him repair his life and relationships.
View Video TranscriptBarry:
Barry, I served in the Army from 1987 to 1989. When I came back from the military, after 9/11 type sentiment. A lot of people still didn't like people in the military, from I guess the Vietnam era and stuff like that, so it wasn't really that popular. I had a lot of depression because I couldn't get a job. I had a lot of anxiety. I used to get panic attacks and I self-medicated with alcohol.
It really affected a lot of my relationships. I have a son, but my anger and drinking a lot, I really couldn’t have very long lasting relationships with anybody, with a female or just friends in general. I’d get an overwhelming feeling that a panic attack and I just wanted to jump out of my body.
I had a girlfriend and she just got tired of me drinking all the time. Sometimes I’d leave and not come home for a few days. It was her home and so she pretty much kicked me out. My family didn’t want me around because I drank too much and I’d do the same thing. I’d take off and not come back for a while. That’s pretty much when I went out on the streets and basically I was going from friends’ to friends’ houses. Finally I just ran out of friends and just had a campsite where I’d go and camp for a while.
I had talked to an old friend that I worked with right when I came out of the service and he’s an Army guy and he told me about the VA and that you could get help there. They really were very understanding, considerate and they really respected my feelings. I went through their alcohol program and their behavior health program, how to deal with different scenarios that might arise and be able to have a productive life.
I went back to college and got my degree. I was hanging around with all these intellectuals, so I had already gone almost three years without drinking and they were going out their toasts and different things, and I thought, “oh man, I’ve gone three years, I can handle that,” so I started drinking again and not too long after that, I got another DWI, and it was my sixth. So, I went to prison.
We had a representative over there from the VA that came over and I didn’t know about it until towards the end of my sentence and he came over, gave me a lot of encouragement, told me what kind of programs they got ready for me when I get out, and it was something to look forward to. So, I immediately when I got out, went to the VA and they got me in behavioral health again, the alcohol and drug counseling, mentorship for getting a job.
My son, when we were growing up, he couldn’t trust me because I was an alcoholic. But after I got out of the prison and I cleaned up my act, and now we have a really good relationship and with my family, I have a really good relationship with them too.
There’s plenty of people that are going through and have gone through the same thing that you’re going through. If it wasn’t for the VA, I’d probably still be on the streets right now.
No matter what you may be experiencing, there is support for getting your life on a better track. Many, many Veterans have found the strength to reach out and make the connection.
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Learn what triggers episodes of noise or light irritation. Try making adjustments to computer and TV screens, and ensure you get the right amount of sleep. If you're taking medication and want to know if it could be affecting your sensitivity to noise or light, talk to your doctor. Certain drugs or medications may cause vision or hearing problems. Never stop taking a prescription without first consulting a medical professional. Learn more steps you can take on our Noise or Light Irritation page.
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Nightmares
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To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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What can I do about drinking or drug use?
There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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Gambling
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If I’m experiencing a gambling problem, what can I do about it right away?
The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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What can I do if I’ve noticed myself engaging in reckless behavior?
There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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