Deciding to get better and seeing results
Wesley:
My name is Wesley and I served in the Airforce from 1985 to 1991. Initially getting out of the service, I went to work with American Airlines where I met my wife and we got married pretty much partying as far as drinking and stuff like that and I think throughout the relationship that just became a prevalent thing with us, not necessarily her so much, but me. My drinking started increasing and then she became pregnant with my son. My drinking never really slowed down until it was told to me too late until the problems presented themselves and we were pretty much on a road to divorce.
She begged me to go to therapy at the time and I was hard-headed; I guess stubborn at the same time. I didn’t want to seek therapy. I figured we could work it out amongst ourselves where nobody had to know. That was my main thing is I guess I was scared of getting exposed to these issues that I was having. I just kept them sort of bottled up between me and her.
After 2002, after my divorce, I moved to Dallas and started getting involved with heavy drinking and the drugs picked up. I had some anger issues coming back. I was through Desert Shield/Desert Storm over there in the Middle East and came back and I always wanted to have a firearm with me for some reason. I got licensed to carry a concealed weapon and stuff like that which sort of got me into some trouble and I had a tough time associating with people that weren’t understanding where I’d been. I felt like pretty much I was losing my mind, so I knew I had to get some help somewhere. I mean, throughout the course of 2002 was just on a downward spiral. I was losing everything I had.
I went to seek help just at a local rehab facility and they told me that I couldn’t stay there because I was a Veteran. And I was like, well, what kind of deal is that, you know, I can’t stay here because I’m a Veteran? And they explained to me that you could go and seek help at the VA. They have a great program here in Dallas, so that’s when I became involved with the VA. I went through a ten-month extensive in-patient rehab between Dallas and Bonham, Texas. I told them my circumstances and everything. I said, I’d be willing to take any class you guys or, you know, recommend for me. I’m here to get better. I’m not here to hide anything. I want to be open and honest about everything that’s gone on. So, they gave me a full load with anger management, cognitive thinking, domestic violence, dual addiction, which is PTSD and drug and alcohol, dual diagnosis I should say.
They basically taught us to do a lot of different things that I had quit doing. You know, I had a lot of hobbies prior to my drinking and drugging and that became my primary hobby was drinkin’ and druggin’. So, they taught me different ways of coping, different coping mechanisms and things like that. And I think all those classes all in all really, really helped me set a foundation.
Today, I feel very comfortable where I’m going. I feel at peace with everything. I don’t hold any resentments. I still go to out-patient therapy at the VA. In fact, I went there today and that helps out tremendously. Any problems you’re having, you can pretty much approach them about anything and they don’t seem surprised or flabbergasted and that’s the great thing; is you think you going through all this stuff by yourself, and you’re really not the only one out there.