As a Marine in Vietnam, Father Bob went through difficult combat experiences. He had flashbacks and nightmares for years, without understanding why. He tried to mask his problems by drinking. Eventually, he reached out to a Vet Center and connected with a counselor who taught him about PTSD. With support, he was able to turn things around.
View Video TranscriptFather Bob:
My name is Father Bob and I'm former United States Marine Corps. Served in Vietnam in 1965 and 1966 and part of 67. I ended up at First Recon Battalion in the beautiful area called Chu Lai and we experienced some very, very difficult things. Everything that was taught to you is so that you can be a protector of the personnel underneath you and sometimes that's possible to be done and other times it just isn't.
My first experience with combat fatigue, whatever it was because it was ill-defined, in fact it was not defined, was going to my parents’ place and visiting them. And it was over the Fourth of July weekend and firecrackers went off and I happened to be resting. And the first thought when I gained consciousness frankly, I was screaming, “Incoming, incoming” and had my hands over my neck, face down, and that trauma type, those triggers stayed with me for 35 years. Nothing was understood. So, you had to suck up and just cope with what you had thinking there’s something wrong with you personally.
I sought ways to obliterate or mask this angst, the sweats, the screaming, to the point that my wife had to sleep in another room. I tried to mask it with drink and in retrospect I will say that I was a functioning alcoholic.
My first contact and serious contact with reaching out was with the Vet Center. My oh my, there was a Counselor there and he kinda took me under his wing. We chatted for a number of sessions as I was progressing. So, part of the process in going through this was of course an evaluation, physically as well as mentally, and it was determined that I did indeed suffer from this thing called PTSD.
For the longest time I had trouble with that acronym because I just didn’t, I guess want to accept it. It took some years for things to start coming out. A few sessions my wife attended, and she vocalized her problem with my drinking. That is when it really struck me that, “Hey wait a minute, look who you’re hurting.” We’ve had a better marriage since that reality struck home than we’ve had since the week after we were married.
So, it’s been a very humbling experience and over the course of time I was able to dissipate the sweats. I was able to dissipate the screaming nightmares. I was able to dissipate to some degree okay, the shock that comes with loud triggers. So, the counseling helped in a very, very major way. But it was a combination of the counseling and the medications.
The counseling gave me a better strength of character for myself, made me feel better about myself and in many respects, engaged me to reach out to others. People are starting to realize they’re not alone and I don’t mean, not “Alone, alone” but not alone in this phenomenon happening to them. There are others that are just in the same situation as they. There’re organizations that are there to help. There are people there that want to help.
No matter what you may be experiencing, there is support for getting your life on a better track. Many, many Veterans have found the strength to reach out and make the connection.
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A flashback can be distressing for you and those around you. Try grounding yourself by focusing on details of your surroundings or neutral physical sensations, such as the feeling of your feet on the floor. Call someone you trust and tell them what is happening. Your family, friends, or health care provider may be able to provide support and help you deal with your flashbacks. Learn more steps you can take on our Flashbacks page.
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Learn what triggers episodes of noise or light irritation. Try making adjustments to computer and TV screens, and ensure you get the right amount of sleep. If you're taking medication and want to know if it could be affecting your sensitivity to noise or light, talk to your doctor. Certain drugs or medications may cause vision or hearing problems. Never stop taking a prescription without first consulting a medical professional. Learn more steps you can take on our Noise or Light Irritation page.
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Nightmares
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To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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