John tried to save an Army buddy from drowning, but he couldn't. He had nightmares and tried to cope by drinking alcohol. Anger caused problems with his relationships and at work. He went to rehab, but he relapsed. After a DUI, he went to VA and began counseling. John got back on track and turned his life around.
View Video TranscriptJohn:
I'm John. I served in the Army and my MOS was a Correctional Specialist which is a Military Policeman and a guard.
There was one incident and it happened off-post though, me and these two guys were swimming and my friend started to drown and I tried to save him and this was in the Big Piney River in Missouri and he kept pulling me under the water and pulling me under the water until finally you know, I couldn’t help him anymore and he drowned, and then the State Police came and they said, You know, because you're military police you have to take him back to the base. And on our way driving back I remember I looked in the backseat and I seen him you know in the back there, and like it haunted me for like 25-30 years. I was only 19 years old and that was the first time I ever saw anybody die.
Back then, they didn't have all these doctors for post-traumatic stress. So, I just had to deal with it. I was drinking a lot to try to forget the problems you know, that I had with the guy drowning and it kept coming up in my head having nightmares. I had anger issues where I was arguing with my wife and then I had a lot of sleep issues where I couldn't sleep. I think that's part of why I drank and did drugs and all the things I did and getting in fights and all that. I hit rock bottom. I was fired from my job. They were foreclosing on my house and then I went to the Hines Hospital and got alcoholism and drug abuse treatment. I was in there for like a month and a half.
I'd stay sober for a while and then I'd relapse and relapse until like about 4 years ago. I got a DUI and then that's when I decided, you know all the trouble that it caused having the car impounded, all the money that I just stopped.
When I lost my job in 2008, I lost my hospital insurance so I started to go to the VA for my blood pressure medicine and talking to those people and telling them stories and they said maybe you should go to the mental health facility on the 6th floor. So, I started to go there and then they put me on the antidepressants and now I'm doing a lot better. It helps to talk about it and my wife even goes with me to the sessions and we talk to the therapist.
I sleep better, I'm getting along with my wife better. I'm eating better. I'm exercising now. I got my license back, my driver's license back, everything, you know everything's starting to go good. It's not like it was back when I served, that it's better now that they got more treatment for posttraumatic stress and that, and that you should get the help now. It's one of the benefits and you earned it. You earned it so why not take advantage of it.
No matter what you may be experiencing, there is support for getting your life on a better track. Many, many Veterans have found the strength to reach out and make the connection.
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If you find yourself living with guilt or remorse about a past action or inaction, try to set aside time to think about your feelings. Remember that everyone has things they would have done differently—but no one can change the past or predict the future. Sometimes the experience is worse if you keep your feelings to yourself. Telling someone, like a family member or friend, about your regrets or guilty feelings can be a good first step to overcoming them. Learn more steps you can take on our Guilt page.
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There are several ways to improve your sleep right away: (1) Make your bedroom a place just for sleeping—not for activities like watching TV, reading, working, or listening to the radio. (2) Avoid light exposure from screens at night, which can throw off your sleep cycle. (3) Avoid alcohol and large meals near bedtime. (4) Maintain a regular sleep schedule. In addition, talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Trouble Sleeping page.
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If you are experiencing confusion, try to slow down and focus on the task at hand. Take regular breaks to avoid feeling tired and overwhelmed. Avoid drinking alcohol, which can make confusion worse. Talk to your health care provider to determine whether a medical condition such as TBI might be contributing to the problem. You can also talk to a pharmacist about the possible effects of medications you're taking. Learn more steps you can take on our Confusion page.
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If you are experiencing difficulty concentrating, avoid distractions like loud music or the television. Develop a routine and try to stick to a regular schedule. Additionally, take regular breaks to prevent feeling tired. Talk to your health care provider to determine whether a condition such as TBI, ADHD, or anxiety might be contributing to the problem. You can also talk to a pharmacist about the possible effects of medications you're taking. Learn more steps you can take on our Difficulty Concentrating page.
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Dizziness
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If you are experiencing dizziness, lie down for a few minutes with your head slightly elevated. Lifestyle changes such as drinking more water, getting enough rest, and avoiding alcohol or drugs can help. Medications and medical conditions such as heart disease or ear issues can also cause dizziness; consult a medical provider if you get dizzy on a regular basis. If you suddenly lose function in part of your body (e.g., arm weakness, face drooping, difficulty speaking) along with experiencing vertigo, this can indicate a serious problem, such as a stroke. Call 911 and seek medical help immediately. Learn more steps you can take on our Dizziness page.
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Flashbacks
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Video Title: Triggers | Signs of a Mental Health Challenge
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Video Title: A science class causes a flashback for Tim
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A flashback can be distressing for you and those around you. Try grounding yourself by focusing on details of your surroundings or neutral physical sensations, such as the feeling of your feet on the floor. Call someone you trust and tell them what is happening. Your family, friends, or health care provider may be able to provide support and help you deal with your flashbacks. Learn more steps you can take on our Flashbacks page.
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Noise or Light Irritation
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If I'm experiencing noise or light irritation, what can I do about it right away?
Learn what triggers episodes of noise or light irritation. Try making adjustments to computer and TV screens, and ensure you get the right amount of sleep. If you're taking medication and want to know if it could be affecting your sensitivity to noise or light, talk to your doctor. Certain drugs or medications may cause vision or hearing problems. Never stop taking a prescription without first consulting a medical professional. Learn more steps you can take on our Noise or Light Irritation page.
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Nightmares
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If I’m having nightmares, what can I do about it right away?
To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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High-Risk Activities
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Alcohol or Drug Misuse
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Video Title: After Challenges With Gambling and Substance Use, Veteran Finds Tools To Recover
Video Title: Anything's Possible
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What can I do about drinking or drug use?
There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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Gambling
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Video Title: Brenda found the support she needed to live well
Video Title: Gambling for the adrenaline rush
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If I’m experiencing a gambling problem, what can I do about it right away?
The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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What can I do if I’ve noticed myself engaging in reckless behavior?
There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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