David was injured in an IED blast overseas. He experienced headaches, light sensitivity, and memory loss. He felt angry, and he isolated himself. Eventually his marriage ended. At VA David was diagnosed with a TBI. Treatment helped him learn practical ways to improve his memory. Now he has headache-free days, and his relationships are stronger.
View Video TranscriptDavid:
My name is David. I served from 1984 to 1988 in the Army reserve as a Military Policeman. Then the Navy came calling with nuclear power and I did that from '88 until 1999. I got out for a couple years and tried the civilian world and then September 11th happened. September 12th I was in the Army recruiting office and after that I wound up going to OCS the next year, earned a commission, got to lead soldiers; Iraq, Afghanistan, Kuwait until I retired last year, 2013.
November 2004, we had gone on a mission, escort mission. On the way back, we got attacked with an IED, somewhere between Bakuba and Balad Ruz. I don’t remember a lot of it to tell you the truth. I remember just about everything else about the mission except this few minutes. But after that we continued the mission and went on and me being me, being the Platoon Leader, we were close enough to the end of our deployment I wasn’t about to go to the aid station or get sent away.
I had the ringing in the ears and that kind of stuff and some headaches, that kind of stuff. But really after I got home, it’s when I started working during the day and the fluorescent lights. The fluorescent lights just bring on these killer headaches, it’s like a trigger or something now. And some short-term memory loss. I went almost 9 years just dealing with it, you know. People would come into my office at work, the lights were always off. I just didn’t tell anybody, I figured I could deal with this. And I did for a long time. And over time it kind of got worse I guess, you know, the headaches got more intense. I was just mad at everybody, you know. And I didn’t understand what was wrong with me, you know. And I made it hard on my family, wound up getting divorced after 20 years. It was my fault, it really was. It’s hard to say that but it was my fault.
My mistake was not communicating with my wife effectively. I didn’t give her a chance to help. I sat in my study in my little room, my little ten by ten room and that’s where I stayed. Life was going on out in the living room without me, just like life had gone on while I was on deployment, and it just made me madder.
After I retired and the VA did their evaluations, they came back and said “Yeah, you’ve got TBI.” That’s what really got me going to the TBI clinic here at the VA medical center. My treatment regimen for TBI is, we’re controlling it right now with medication. My primary method of dealing with the memory loss, and it helped some, is a cell phone of all things. You know, you got a calendar, you’ve got a little note thing in there, you can set reminders to do this. And I’ll say I have a 15-year-old daughter that loves to remind me of things. But that’s one way, I mean, sometimes you got to write yourself a note. For the last couple of months especially, symptoms have been almost negligible. The occasional headache but nothing where I’m going to hide in a dark room or anything like that and her goal for me was like “We want you to have headache-free days.” And for the first time in years I’ve actually had a lot of those lately.
Just having someone on your side and knowing what to do helps a lot. We like to say a lot of times “Getting help helps.” And it not only helps you, it helps those around you that care about you. I would say what you need to do is communicate with your family, and if you don’t want to start there find someone, whether it’s a VA counselor or a Pastor, a civilian counselor, whatever. Someone you can trust and someone you can talk to. You can heal over time, because the same woman I divorced, we got married again last year so the family can be restored. So, there is hope.
No matter what you may be experiencing, there is support for getting your life on a better track. Many, many Veterans have found the strength to reach out and make the connection.
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If you are experiencing confusion, try to slow down and focus on the task at hand. Take regular breaks to avoid feeling tired and overwhelmed. Avoid drinking alcohol, which can make confusion worse. Talk to your health care provider to determine whether a medical condition such as TBI might be contributing to the problem. You can also talk to a pharmacist about the possible effects of medications you're taking. Learn more steps you can take on our Confusion page.
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If you are experiencing dizziness, lie down for a few minutes with your head slightly elevated. Lifestyle changes such as drinking more water, getting enough rest, and avoiding alcohol or drugs can help. Medications and medical conditions such as heart disease or ear issues can also cause dizziness; consult a medical provider if you get dizzy on a regular basis. If you suddenly lose function in part of your body (e.g., arm weakness, face drooping, difficulty speaking) along with experiencing vertigo, this can indicate a serious problem, such as a stroke. Call 911 and seek medical help immediately. Learn more steps you can take on our Dizziness page.
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Learn what triggers episodes of noise or light irritation. Try making adjustments to computer and TV screens, and ensure you get the right amount of sleep. If you're taking medication and want to know if it could be affecting your sensitivity to noise or light, talk to your doctor. Certain drugs or medications may cause vision or hearing problems. Never stop taking a prescription without first consulting a medical professional. Learn more steps you can take on our Noise or Light Irritation page.
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Nightmares
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To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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What can I do about drinking or drug use?
There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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If I’m experiencing a gambling problem, what can I do about it right away?
The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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What can I do if I’ve noticed myself engaging in reckless behavior?
There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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