Millye, an Army Veteran, dealt with depression while serving in the military when she couldn’t live as a transgender woman. She was discharged after her superiors learned of her plans to transition. Years later, a friend told her about VA transgender support groups. Now Millye is moving forward with her life as the woman she was meant to be.
View Video TranscriptMillye:
My name is Millye and I served in the military in the Army during the ‘60s. I would get depressed and wouldn't know why. I didn't know it was because I really wanted to be her. I was 14 when my mom realized that I was trans. I would go and sit on the porch and put on my mother's makeup and go and put anything feminine on, just anything would give me a little release.
I joined the service with my best friend, Celina. She and I went in on the buddy system. I wanted to become a nurse and I was a feminine boy and during that time, nursing was a feminine noun, and I wanted a vocation and I knew that I was a caregiver. Every night after dinner, I would always go to the chaplain and pray, and one day I was so emotionally drawn, I was just crying hysterically at the chaplain and one of the pastors walked in and said, “Why are you crying?” I said, “Within the next nine months, I will be out and I'm going and having surgery.” “What do you mean surgery?” And I shared a sex change. “Did you...” I said, “No, you're the first person that I've told,” and I'm crying, thinking it was going to be confidential.
I went and I called my mother, and I told her and she said, “Well, baby, you can always come home. There's always a place for you.” And I said, “I don't know what they're going to do, but they did say that they were going to discharge me,” and when my discharge came, I packed my clothes and I made sure that I would be back in Millye and I did. I had started back taking bootleg hormones and my breasts was getting bigger, and I've been that woman ever since. I went to school and got my degree. I became a nurse and a teacher and I have been an advocate.
Celina, my girlfriend that passed, she told me, “You can go to the VA and talk to the doctors because they are accepting trans issues.” I use the VA for my networking in helping other VA. I use the VA for my one-on-one when I’m feeling stressed and I need to talk to someone. And every Tuesday group, it’s not the trans portion, it’s mostly dealing with my learning how to forgive and move forward. I’ve waited many, many years to have this conversation, many, many years and now it’s here. Thank you.
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The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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