When Ray left the Army, he didn’t know how to adapt to civilian life. He tried to cope with the loss of camaraderie by drinking. After a downward spiral, he ended up in prison. He connected with the Veterans Treatment Court, and his court-ordered mental health treatment saved his life. Now he gives back to the Veteran community.
View Video TranscriptRay:
My name is Ray. I served in the United States Army. I served as an Infantry Soldier from 1998 to 2001. It was a good experience for me. The brotherhood, the camaraderie amongst us Infantryman was unlike any other that I've ever experienced in my life. Getting out of the military was very difficult for me. I didn't know how to adapt to the civilian life. I felt lost in the world. I felt very lost. The brotherhood that I was a part of, I was no longer around my battle buddies. I was no longer doing something around other people that thought the same way that I do, and I chose the drink as a way to deal with life.
I was drinking every day and I was a fully functional alcoholic for a better part of a decade. Once I became a one man party is when I knew I was in trouble. Once I started pushing everyone away from me, anytime I was out of work, or even including work, my entire life revolved around me consuming alcohol.
Because of the alcohol, it was a downward spiral. I went through a divorce, I lost my children, I lost my home to foreclosure, I gave up my career with the Federal Government. I ultimately, I gave up on life. There were times in my life where I actually contemplated suicide. I ended up homeless out on the streets, in and out of jail.
I woke up in a jail cell. I was in for felonies, endangering the public, aggravated assault on a Police Officer so I had really gotten into trouble there. I did a little bit of time and I was introduced to Veterans Court. Veterans Court is a program for us Veterans. You know, they help us with programs, they court order us to mental health treatment. They order us to get the help that we need. They said I needed the help, let me go talk to somebody. Let me go see what kind of help I need, and so I did it.
Going to mental health treatment, meeting with the mental health provider, I was given referrals for a transitional work experience program. It’s through the compensated work therapy program at the VA. It’s work therapy. You’re working, whether you’re working the food service, laundry, housekeeping. You’re doing different duties throughout the hospital there just to kinda get you around other Veterans and people and trying to get you back to the world of working again.
Being around other Veterans, trying to overcome barriers and struggles was good for me. I was in other group sessions with Veterans that had similar situations as myself. We could definitely relate to one another. We’d just sit there, we’d talk about what’s going on with our lives and try to help each other, try to motivate each other to make positive life changes.
I learned to set healthy boundaries in my life. I learned of different ways to cope with reality than having to self-medicate. Today I practice a lot of self-care. I do things that make me feel good in the heart. Instead of numbing the pain of reality, I do things that make my heart feel good.
Because of these programs, the VA sent me to school to be a Certified Peer Support Specialist, and it’s helped me become a better person. Now I get to help others, others that are going through some of the struggles that I’ve been through. I’ve been down some very dark lonely roads, and if I can inspire one person to make certain changes in his or her life, then I’ve done my part.
No matter what you may be experiencing, there is support for getting your life on a better track. Many, many Veterans have found the strength to reach out and make the connection.
An online source of information for persons seeking treatment facilities in the United States or U.S. territories for substance abuse/addiction and/or mental health problems.
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To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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