When a relative died from substance misuse, Daniel realized he was numbing his PTSD with drugs. His drug use resulted in a DUI charge and isolation from his family. Daniel’s life changed when he sought help from VA. Through substance use programs and couple’s counselling, he is now sober and has repaired relationships with his family.
View Video TranscriptDaniel:
My name is Daniel I was in the United States Army and I was in there from 96 to 2000. I was in airborne infantry with the 82nd airborne. A pretty prestige, hard-core, badass job. Two years into the military I came home because a best friend had taken his own life. Six years later I buried my brother-in-law for the same thing through PTSD and mixing alcohol with his medication. That was like an eye opener for me because I was doing that same thing. I was taking meds that were being prescribed and I was mixing them with anything and everything I could get my hands on.
It kind of snowballed everything, it affected my wife, affected my marriage, affected my relationship with my children. I had gotten a DUI with my 8 month old child in the car, it lead to my wife kicking me out multiple times. I chose sleeping in a VA parking lot or on a VA park bench than sleeping at home in a bed with my wife and kids.
My two teenager sons were looking into changing their last name that is how much harm I had caused. I was building my hole deeper and digging it deeper and deeper.
I got tired of being, I got tired of fighting myself, I got tired of wondering why. I got tired of waking up sick to my stomach. I got tired of stealing from my kids. I got tired of stealing from my wife. I just did not know how the first step to take on how to stop drinking, to stop harming everybody else around me, stop harming the family. And I found an anger management program through the VA and there is where I met a doctor and he got me involved with the ABC program. Addictive Behaviors Clinic through the support of the VA and I put my whole self into it and it has just been a …I started a whole different life this past two years. We went through kind of marital counseling where they brought her… where the doctor would bring her in and sit with us and I was able to kind of tell her really for the first time what was going on, why I was upset or angry or why I acted the way I did or said the things I did. I am very lucky that my wife has stayed behind me.
I want to give back to her now, for her carrying for me for all of those times, something I am excited to do now, to be a husband, to be a father. February 2 was my two year sober anniversary. My son wanted a picture with me, just me and him and the cake and he put it on all of his social media posts to show how proud he was of me. Now we have a 6-year-old who will never experience that side of his father. You know I get joy out of going to drop him off at kindergarten or small joys out of my son telling me something funny that happened at school today. When they come up to me and just put their arm around me for now reason and say “I love you dad” for no reason. It is just a total blessing to be a part of their lives now. I have gotten people coming to me and telling me that they were seeking their own help now because they saw that if I could do it then they definitely could do it.
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If you are experiencing confusion, try to slow down and focus on the task at hand. Take regular breaks to avoid feeling tired and overwhelmed. Avoid drinking alcohol, which can make confusion worse. Talk to your health care provider to determine whether a medical condition such as TBI might be contributing to the problem. You can also talk to a pharmacist about the possible effects of medications you're taking. Learn more steps you can take on our Confusion page.
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If you are experiencing difficulty concentrating, avoid distractions like loud music or the television. Develop a routine and try to stick to a regular schedule. Additionally, take regular breaks to prevent feeling tired. Talk to your health care provider to determine whether a condition such as TBI, ADHD, or anxiety might be contributing to the problem. You can also talk to a pharmacist about the possible effects of medications you're taking. Learn more steps you can take on our Difficulty Concentrating page.
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If you are experiencing dizziness, lie down for a few minutes with your head slightly elevated. Lifestyle changes such as drinking more water, getting enough rest, and avoiding alcohol or drugs can help. Medications and medical conditions such as heart disease or ear issues can also cause dizziness; consult a medical provider if you get dizzy on a regular basis. If you suddenly lose function in part of your body (e.g., arm weakness, face drooping, difficulty speaking) along with experiencing vertigo, this can indicate a serious problem, such as a stroke. Call 911 and seek medical help immediately. Learn more steps you can take on our Dizziness page.
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Flashbacks
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A flashback can be distressing for you and those around you. Try grounding yourself by focusing on details of your surroundings or neutral physical sensations, such as the feeling of your feet on the floor. Call someone you trust and tell them what is happening. Your family, friends, or health care provider may be able to provide support and help you deal with your flashbacks. Learn more steps you can take on our Flashbacks page.
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Noise or Light Irritation
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If I'm experiencing noise or light irritation, what can I do about it right away?
Learn what triggers episodes of noise or light irritation. Try making adjustments to computer and TV screens, and ensure you get the right amount of sleep. If you're taking medication and want to know if it could be affecting your sensitivity to noise or light, talk to your doctor. Certain drugs or medications may cause vision or hearing problems. Never stop taking a prescription without first consulting a medical professional. Learn more steps you can take on our Noise or Light Irritation page.
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Nightmares
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To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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High-Risk Activities
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Alcohol or Drug Misuse
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Video Title: Anything's Possible
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What can I do about drinking or drug use?
There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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Gambling
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Video Title: Brenda found the support she needed to live well
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If I’m experiencing a gambling problem, what can I do about it right away?
The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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Video Title: I was carrying a heavy load
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What can I do if I’ve noticed myself engaging in reckless behavior?
There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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