After experiencing combat injuries during his time in the Army, Jeff began misusing methamphetamine. When his drug use was discovered, he was discharged from the service and became homeless. An overdose was the wake-up call Jeff needed to seek treatment. Through rehab, he not only stopped using drugs but also built a stronger relationship with his son.
View Video TranscriptJeff:
My name is Jeff and I was in the Army from 2002 until 2014. I have been blown up a few times. Grenade blast, rockets, parachute jumps, mild concussions here and there that you just get blown off. You don't even bother going in to see the medics for it, but the next day you have a really pounding headache, like where did that come from.
Looking back, I think I was looking for a way out of all of the pain that led me to violate my morals and use meth. There was no guilt because you were numb. There was no more shame because I was numb. By February 2014 I’d been caught. My commander made it a point to let me know that I picked the wrong company commander to do drugs under. When I first got out of the military, got kicked out of the military I was homeless. I was living out of the back of my truck. There was a point in time when I was doing meth. I thought I would die. There was one point in time I actually did overdose. It wasn’t intentional, but it happened. Probably one of the scariest moments of my life knowing full well okay these are all the signs and symptoms of an overdose, too embarrassed and too ashamed to go to the hospital and get treatment for it. It was kind of a perfect storm and I’m like “Okay, something has got to change.”
Veteran’s Trauma Court in Colorado basically made an exception for me based on my background, based on the original charges and they went ahead and accepted me in the program there. This program has helped change my life literally. You’re going to be expected to go to counseling, you’re going to be expected to go to anger management classes, you’re going to be expected if you are order to take medication, you’re going to be expected to take that medication. You are going to be held accountable for what you do and what you fail to do.
I walked in and saw my probation officer. He looked at me, he was like “Jeff you still have value.” He was like I brought you into this section knowing you had problems, but at the same time knowing you had value. He gave me a chance and I was truly grateful for it. I said “Well I want to change. I don’t want to keep living this life anymore. I want off the drugs, I don’t want to go back, I want a better life with my family. I want to be able to get back in the medical field if possible.” And he really made all that happen. I moved very quickly through all of the gates, because it was something I wanted to do. My life is so different from where thought I was gonna be. I went from homeless to looking at buying a house and re-establishing myself in the medical field.
Me and my son, my oldest son especially, we are a lot closer than we ever have been. We’re able to talk about things nowadays. As hard and as trying as it was I am actually grateful that I went through it all, because it allowed me to come out not only as a better person, but as a better father.
Veteran’s Trauma Court is actually real, it’s legit. They really do want to help. If you actually utilize the resources that are there it is not going to be a painless process by any means but it can be a life changing process. It is possible. I didn’t think it was, but I had a little bit of hope and I ran with it and that is all anybody needs.
No matter what you may be experiencing, there is support for getting your life on a better track. Many, many Veterans have found the strength to reach out and make the connection.
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If you find yourself living with guilt or remorse about a past action or inaction, try to set aside time to think about your feelings. Remember that everyone has things they would have done differently—but no one can change the past or predict the future. Sometimes the experience is worse if you keep your feelings to yourself. Telling someone, like a family member or friend, about your regrets or guilty feelings can be a good first step to overcoming them. Learn more steps you can take on our Guilt page.
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If you are experiencing confusion, try to slow down and focus on the task at hand. Take regular breaks to avoid feeling tired and overwhelmed. Avoid drinking alcohol, which can make confusion worse. Talk to your health care provider to determine whether a medical condition such as TBI might be contributing to the problem. You can also talk to a pharmacist about the possible effects of medications you're taking. Learn more steps you can take on our Confusion page.
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If you are experiencing dizziness, lie down for a few minutes with your head slightly elevated. Lifestyle changes such as drinking more water, getting enough rest, and avoiding alcohol or drugs can help. Medications and medical conditions such as heart disease or ear issues can also cause dizziness; consult a medical provider if you get dizzy on a regular basis. If you suddenly lose function in part of your body (e.g., arm weakness, face drooping, difficulty speaking) along with experiencing vertigo, this can indicate a serious problem, such as a stroke. Call 911 and seek medical help immediately. Learn more steps you can take on our Dizziness page.
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A flashback can be distressing for you and those around you. Try grounding yourself by focusing on details of your surroundings or neutral physical sensations, such as the feeling of your feet on the floor. Call someone you trust and tell them what is happening. Your family, friends, or health care provider may be able to provide support and help you deal with your flashbacks. Learn more steps you can take on our Flashbacks page.
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Learn what triggers episodes of noise or light irritation. Try making adjustments to computer and TV screens, and ensure you get the right amount of sleep. If you're taking medication and want to know if it could be affecting your sensitivity to noise or light, talk to your doctor. Certain drugs or medications may cause vision or hearing problems. Never stop taking a prescription without first consulting a medical professional. Learn more steps you can take on our Noise or Light Irritation page.
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Nightmares
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To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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What can I do about drinking or drug use?
There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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Gambling
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If I’m experiencing a gambling problem, what can I do about it right away?
The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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Video Title: “Each day was a new opportunity.” Veteran Reflects on Sobriety Journey
Video Title: I was carrying a heavy load
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What can I do if I’ve noticed myself engaging in reckless behavior?
There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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