Sue, a U.S. Navy Veteran, felt guilty and depressed after she was sexually assaulted. A friend took her to VA, where she began therapy and started attending a transgender support group. Now, Sue feels free to be her true self.
View Video TranscriptSue:
I'm Sue, I served in the United States Navy in 1971 and 72 in the Gulf of Tonkin. I always knew that there was something a little bit different because my thought process wasn't like the other boys. I had to pretend to be a guy and as I grew up, I called it wearing my man suit. I had to hide it all the time. When I was in the Service, I had to do the same thing.
On the night before my discharge, I was attacked by six men, knocked out, and I was raped and sodomized and left for dead, so that had a major effect on the rest of my life. Being hit in the back of the head and knocked out, and then the guilt associated with that because I thought because I was big I should’ve been able to protect myself and do something, but when you’re attacked, you’re attacked.
After I got out of the service I drank. I drank a lot. It helped me to disguise, it helped me to try to forget. I couldn’t function anymore, I had no pride anymore, so it got to that point where I couldn’t live. I didn’t want to live.
In the early days of the VA we didn’t have PTSD, it was a behavior problem. So, at that time the answer was Librium and so that actually helped me to not drink as much. I was already 14 years sober, but I still couldn’t hold a job, I couldn’t have any kind of a relationship. I mean, I didn’t know what was wrong with me and I guess that’s the point I got to, is that I can’t live like this anymore and there’s got to be some way. And a friend took me to the VA. That’s when I was able to get help to start my new life.
I went to an in-house PTSD program and I also had a Therapist that I used to see and talk to about things once I started receiving the proper mental health care, which I got through the VA. If I didn’t have the VA, I’d still be out there or dead. Once I was finally diagnosed with what was wrong with me, it took a while to get the proper balance of medication and certain kinds, that that frustration and that feeling finally went away.
I see my Psychiatrist every three months. I have access to my Social Worker who I talk to on a regular basis, and if I’m not doing good, I found out that VA had transgender support groups. We can talk about issues, different things that people are going through the fear of doing a lot of things. So, there’s somebody available at any time. I am free, I’m happy… I’m free to be who I am, and it took a long time to get here. If you’re tired of living like you’re living, there is help. You don’t have to have this pain, you don’t have to carry this alone, you know, there’s thousands of us out there. The help is there, and the VA has come a long, long way in helping.
No matter what you may be experiencing, there is support for getting your life on a better track. Many, many Veterans have found the strength to reach out and make the connection.
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Learn what triggers episodes of noise or light irritation. Try making adjustments to computer and TV screens, and ensure you get the right amount of sleep. If you're taking medication and want to know if it could be affecting your sensitivity to noise or light, talk to your doctor. Certain drugs or medications may cause vision or hearing problems. Never stop taking a prescription without first consulting a medical professional. Learn more steps you can take on our Noise or Light Irritation page.
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To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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If I’m experiencing a gambling problem, what can I do about it right away?
The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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What can I do if I’ve noticed myself engaging in reckless behavior?
There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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